Your parents have pure love for you in the depth of their heart. Of course their personalities may not always be aware of that. Unconditional love is easily forgotten and replaced by manipulation or even coercion: “We want you to be different from the way you are (—or we won’t love you).” All of course for your highest good.

As you react, resist or resent, it may not be obvious to you that you do the same to them. You also want them to be different than they are—also of course for their highest good. Someone has to change.

I’m betting on you.

In the depth of your heart you have pure love for your parents—this is simply the nature of the heart and there is nothing you can do about it.  In your personality you can untangle yourself from the jungle of emotions and reactions. You can make peace happen and that will give you freedom.

Your parents do not have to change for that. You do—if you want freedom. By your own efforts you alone can change the relationship, by changing you. This is wonderful news. Change you to leave the place of a victim for good. Change you to end the compulsion to react and defend and the anguish of this relationship.

What you need to change:

• Confused and scattered mind (in stillness and meditation)
• Stressful thoughts (with The Work of Byron Katie)
• Negative emotions (with Open Attention or Presence)
• The inability to feel your amazing love (with HeartSourcing)

With these 4 superb skills you can end the root of all suffering. Imagine yourself meeting your parents with a clear mind, balanced emotions and an open heart. What would it be like to be with them like this? Would you fall for the old family drama?

This clarity and openness are up to you. Your parents have been your great teachers and you can learn from them for a lifetime. They have given you life and they are giving you now the lessons you need to work through to find your freedom. They show you where you are not yet enlightened. Are you grateful yet?

By your consistent, patient and focused practice of any or all of these skills you can learn to meet your parents with freedom and openness. Then you will not engage in the dysfunction, you will simply love them instead. It would not be surprising to see them react positively to your open heart. Hearts do that.

So any time now when they push your button, mentally bow to your teachers and resolve to get free of the button. You might be surprised to see how fast change can happen, even when you thought the situation was beyond hope. It never is.

Please watch the following videos that goes deeper into this subject. They are taken from Satsang with Ram Giri.

Part 1

Part 2

Love and Blessings,

Ram Giri

and the Skills for Awakening team

(305) 567-1406 / info@skillsforawakening.com